I’m 38 weeks pregnant. It’s raining and very windy. I am home alone with my two children who are 3 and 6.
They are crazy.
My home is becoming messier by the moment. Out of control.
The screaming…..Oh the screaming,
The snotty noses…
They are hitting each other.
I breathe and whisper, “Let’s be gentle.”
My 3 year old has started calling me Stupid and his newest, “You’re an idiot!”I believe he heard that phrase in reference to our new President elect. I’m in good company, I see.
Where am I? How will I survive this?
No, how will I THRIVE within this?
What has brought you to your knees and begged you to get up and stand stronger than before? Where in your life have you felt such an undoing; a suffering and such raw pure emotion that you wanted to flee, just to escape the pain and agony, but you KNEW you didn’t want to make that choice again. Can you pinpoint a moment where you choose a different path even though you had no idea how to move down it?
So I sit and let the tears roll. I rock and breathe and pray. I meditate in the most imperfect of environments, because that is where I will find center. I’m connecting to something beyond myself and my deep, dark neural pathways I am fighting to avoid.
This is my narrow space where I will Thrive.